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      2006年中國政府白皮書《中國老年事業的發展》中的翻譯問題
      作者:黃衛峰    文章來源:本站原創    點擊數:    更新時間:2011/10/14    
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      3. 2005年,包括貧困老年人在內的2233萬城市貧困人口領取了最低生活保障金,基本實現應保盡保。

      In 2005, some 22.33 million impoverished urban residents (including impoverished elderly people) received such allowances, including almost all the people eligible for receiving the minimum living allowance.

      問題:這句話的譯文與原文一樣,兩次重復“貧困”和“保障金”,使譯文讀起來不符合英語表達習慣,而且在意思在與原文有出入。譯文應改為In 2005, some 22.33 million impoverished urban residents, including the aged, received the minimum living allowance. Thus, the goal of covering all the people eligible to such aid is basically realized.

      4. 地方政府積極組織實施開發式扶貧,扶持低齡、健康、有勞動能力的貧困老年人從事種植、養殖和加工等項目,增強貧困老年人的生產自助能力。

      Meanwhile, local governments are actively organizing "helping the poor through production" schemes. They are doing their best to help poor people in their 60s who are generally healthy and strong enough to work to engage in farming, aquaculture and processing business, so that they can support themselves.

      問題:在分析本句存在的問題之前,值得指出的是,譯者充分運用了英語中的代詞來避免重復“老年人”,在這點上做得很好。但to work顯然多余,而且第一句和第二句之間不能很好地銜接起來。另外,時態的使用也值得商榷。建議改為:Meanwhile, local governments have actively organized "helping the poor through production" schemes. They are doing their best to help poor people in their 60s who are generally healthy and strong enough to work to engage in farming, aquaculture and processing business, so that they can support themselves.

      5. 中華人民共和國老年人權益保障法》規定,贍養人有義務耕種老年人承包的田地,照管老年人的林木和牲畜等,收益歸老年人所有,以保障老年人的基本生活來源。

      The Law of the People's Republic of China on the Protection of the Rights and Interests of Elderly People stipulates that an elderly person's guardian is obligated to till the land contracted to the elderly person he/she supports, and also to tend forestry and livestock under the elderly person's charge. The revenue from these will go to the elderly person as a guaranteed source for his/her basic livelihood.

      問題:an elderly person's guardian is obligated to till the land contracted to the elderly person he/she supports一句中的he/she supports與前面的guardian屬于意思重復,顯然多余。后半句中的also也多余。最后一句也存在表達累贅問題,而且his/her的使用容易與前面的he/she相混淆,以為指同一人(實際上完全不同),從而給讀者帶來閱讀困難,而且語氣助詞will的使用不符合法律英語規范。建議全句改為:According to the Law of the People's Republic of China on the Protection of the Rights and Interests of Elderly People, a guardian is obligated to till the contracted land and tend forestry and livestock for the elderly person. The revenues thereof shall be used to guarantee the basic livelihood of the elderly person.

      6. 國務院有關部門和地方各級人民政府,分別制定本部門老齡工作行動計劃和本地方老齡事業發展規劃。

      Relevant departments under the State Council and local people's governments at all levels have formulated action plans for work concerning elderly people in their departments and plans for the development of undertakings for the aged in their localities.

      問題:譯者沒有對原文進行整合,而是逐字翻譯,結果導致表達重復。可以簡化為:The relevant departments under the State Council and local governments at various levels have formulated their respective plans concerning elderly people.

      7. 近二十年來,全國人大及其常委會、國務院及其有關部門頒布的老齡法律、法規、規章及有關政策達200余件,初步形成以《中華人民共和國憲法》為基礎,《中華人民共和國老年人權益保障法》為主體,包括有關法律、行政法規、地方性法規、國務院部門規章、地方政府規章和有關政策在內的老齡法律法規政策體系框架。

      Over the past 20 years or so, the National People's Congress and its Standing Committee, the State Council, and departments concerned have promulgated some 200 laws, regulations and policies concerning elderly people. A framework of laws, regulations and policies in this regard has been established with the Constitution of the People's Republic of China as its foundation, and the Law of the People's Republic of China on the Protection of the Rights and Interests of Elderly People as its backbone, together with other relevant laws, administrative regulations, local regulations, rules, regulations and related policies formulated by departments of the State Council and local governments.

      問題:該段譯文的累贅現象也是顯而易見的。試比較:Over the past 20 years or so, the National People's Congress and its Standing Committee, and the State Council and its relevant departments have promulgated more than 200 laws, regulations, rules and policies concerning elderly people, thus evolving an initial legal framework with the Constitution of the People's Republic of China as its foundation and the Law of the People's Republic of China on the Protection of the Rights and Interests of Elderly People as its backbone.

       

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